Sri Ramakrishna’s timeless advice to Married People.
Sri Ramakrishna was one of the most enlightened sages the world has ever seen. Some people may not know him but they might be knowing about Swami Vivekananda. Now Sri Ramakrishna was the guru of Swami Vivekananda. Sri Ramakrishna had accepted a few selected disciples and they stayed with him. Sri Ramakrishna would engage with them about spiritual discussions, guide them about God and help them develop divine powers. All these discussions were recorded by one of his disciple and it is compiled in the book THE GOSPEL OF SRIRAMAKRISHNA.
In one of the chapters from this book, Sri Ramakrishna explains about the duties and responsibilities a person who is married should carry in the world. I have compiled selected points so that you can get better idea about what his opinion and outlook was about married people. It has got WEALTH OF WISDOM
THESE ARE THE MESSAGES AND ADVICE WHICH SRI RAMAKRISHNA HAS SHARED WITH HIS DEVOTEES
GOD AND HIS SPLENDOR
God alone is real; the splendour has but a two-days existence. The magician and his magic. All become speechless with wonder at the magic, but it is all unreal. The magician alone is real. The rich man and his garden. People see only the garden; they should look for its rich owner.”
“The worldly man is a hypocrite. He cannot be guileless. He professes to love God, but he is attracted by worldly objects. He doesn’t give God even a very small part of the love he feels for ‘woman and gold’. But he says that he loves God. (To Mani Mallick) Give up hypocrisy.”
“A wife endowed with spiritual wisdom is a real partner in life. She greatly helps her husband to follow the religious path. After the birth of one or two children they live like brother and sister. Both of them are devotees of God — His servant and His handmaid. Their family is a spiritual family. They are always happy with God and His devotees. They know that God alone is their own, from everlasting to everlasting. They are like the Pandava brothers; they do not forget God in happiness or in sorrow.
Sri Ramakrishna talks about one of his disciple, HAZRA
“Hazra used to practise much japa and austerity here. But in the country he has his wife, children, and land. Therefore along with his spiritual discipline he carried on the business of a broker. Such people cannot be true to their word. One moment they say they will give up fish, but the next moment they break their vow.
‘Give up the ego that makes you feel, “I am the doer; I am teaching people.”‘ Keshab said to me, ‘Sir, then I cannot keep the organization.’ Thereupon I said to him, ‘Give up the “wicked ego”.’ One doesn’t have to renounce the ego that makes one feel, ‘I am the servant of God; I am His devotee.’ One doesn’t develop the ‘divine ego’ as long as one retains the ‘wicked ego’. If a man is in charge of the store-room, the master of the house doesn’t feel responsible for it.
“To realize God is the one goal of life. While aiming his arrow at the mark, Arjuna said, ‘I see only the eye of the bird and nothing else — not the kings, not the trees, not even the bird itself.’
“The realization of God is enough for me. What does it matter if I don’t know Sanskrit?
“The grace of God falls alike on all His children, learned and illiterate — whoever longs for Him. The father has the same love for all his children. Suppose a father has five children. One calls him ‘Baba’, some ‘Ba’, and some ‘Pa’. These last cannot pronounce the whole word. Does the father love those who address him as ‘Baba’ more than those who call him ‘Pa’? The father knows that these last are simply too young to say ‘Baba’ correctly.
So long as a man does not realize God, so long it is real; because at that time he makes mistakes and through unreal. self-delusion says: “Me and mine!’ Being fettered by this self-delusion, he drowns in the sea of lust and worldliness, and becomes so blinded by ignorance that he cannot see the way out. You yourself can notice how transitory the world is. Look at this house; how many people have come and gone; how many people have been born and have died in it! Now it exists, now it does not; it is ephemeral. Those whom you call your own will vanish when your eyes are closed.
If you have no one in the household, still you are bound and cannot go anywhere because of some distant relative. The way is open, but the fish cannot escape from the net. The silkworm makes its own cocoon, but does not know how to get out and consequently dies in it. A householder should take care of his children, but at the same time he should think of them as Baby Krishna, or as children of hoider should” God. Serve your father as God, and live in the your mother as Divine Mother. After realizing God, if a man lives with his wife, he has no physical relation with her. Both live like Bhaktas or true devotees. They talk of spiritual subjects and spend their time in thinking of God and in caring for His Bhaktas. They serve God who dwells in all beings.